He is Risen :)

& How blessed we are because of His death.

La Di Da... Life & Revelation

When I shave my legs now I feel very accomplished. Ha.

Tomorrow is my ultrasound, bright and early. I get so excited about ultrasounds... like Christmas excited.
Anybody else?

Well for anyone who prayed about our housing situation I am pretty confident that lil hiccup in the process has passed! Praise God!
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So this week the Lord has done a lot in my walk... it's been semi intense in my heart. I guess about Tuesday I called Jasha in tears. I pretty much told him that although I have found myself growing closer to the Lord I also see the sins in my life seemingly growing. I was frustrated, angry and even scared. My "Momma-ness" started coming out full blast as I ranted about how I didn't want my sins to be taught to my baby boy. Jasha got really happy though as I was talking to him. He told me that it is a blessing to have awareness of one's wickedness, and that when we try to become more like Christ we usually are more aware of our flesh. He also said that although I have been walking with the Lord longer than him he was sometimes concerned that my relationship with the Lord was segmented. As soon as he said that I knew it was true... but now as I am actively trying to make my relationship with God my TOP priority... I am realizing really how disjointed I was before. Almost like a split personality... there was the good and loving side of me that loved God greatly, and then there was the lazy, worldly side of me who put God on the back-burner. Now I'm not saying everything is peaches and roses currently... but I know the Lord is giving me this revelation so that I may have hope to continue on my quest be His fully.

As Romans 7:18 says
 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.

He is the only one who will help us. We simply cannot do it on our own... 
I am trying to really understand that. 

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Delay Is Not Denial.

A long but good story:

Okay so I haven't blogged about this, but I really really have wanted to, but this is the story of our Good Lord leading us... always.

See that cute little 1950s house above? That is going to be our house...

At least I hope. We have a signed contract & a closing date (middle May- yes right before Asher should be born) but I won't feel like its real until we have keys in our hands and are standing in it. Still the story of how it came to be is pretty crazy, 

and here it is...

Awhile ago I mentioned Jasha & I were applying for home loans, etc. That was the easy part. Then we started looking. Our price range wasn't grand by any means, but there were a lot of houses out there, or so I thought.

Then we found a house. It was cute, and really nice, but not exactly in our price range, but it had been on the market for literally 300 days when we made an lower offer. We were pretty confident since it had been on the market that long untouched we could get it. Nope... the day we put an offer on it someone else put a full price offer on it. I was really sad, but we knew well that is all God. He must be protecting us. 

I began searching and searching and searching for the right house.

But we did NOT want to buy a house just because we had a loan. It had to be right. Seriously, though, there was nothing on the market I liked, so we got our realtor Kim to start showing us some apartments. 

*Side note here: Kim is amazing. If you live in the Fredericksburg, VA area you should def use her. She and her husband pray specifically for anyone they work with. (Click HERE for a link to her site)In fact she had gotten her good friend to pray for us, and she had a prophetic word for us that day... "Delay is not denial." At the time I was not sure what it meant, but I'll get to that later."

There were some really nice apartments, and then some really not nice ones. 

I do believe Josh called one a hobbit's home. Anyways, Kim had printed out all the apartments specs to look out, and in the bottom of the pile was another house for sell. I had seen it before, but there were no inside pictures, and it was not in the exact area we were looking to live in. It was then we all felt we should go check it out. It was great, and had tons of unfinished space that could literally double the square footage of the house. We made an offer right away. Except we went a few thousand under the asking price because of our price range. 

At this time we thought it was going to be ours. Also at this time the Lord lead me to read a book a few days after the offer was made... Hind's Feet in High Places by Hannah Hurnard. This book is amazing as it stands, but as I was reading it a repeating theme kept coming up. The Shepherd in the story (who represented Jesus) kept telling the main character (basically) I delay you not to death, but to the good things I have for you. It was then I knew we didn't get that house, and sure enough the next day we found out someone had made a full offer again on the house.

I felt like the Lord wanted us to keep looking for a house, but I was seriously not wanting to. There was nothing on the market we liked, and while living with family is great (seriously a HUGE blessing) I really wanted my own place. We have lived with other people for the last 8 months of marriage after having our own place for a year, and I just feel like its time to have our own place again... especially with Asher coming. Well that day I felt God wanting me to look at the new houses on the market one more time, and there it was.... my dream home, and it had literally come on the market that day! I just knew this was the one. There was only one picture of it from the outside but I felt a fluttering in my spirit telling me...This is it! I called Josh right away and told him that I was sure this is the house for us. He was hesitant at first. I easily get excited ha... but when he came home I told him how much I felt it was from the Lord. Around midnight that night more pictures of the inside were posted and when Josh saw them he knew too. We emailed our realtor that night and said I know we haven't seen it yet, and want to tomorrow, but we also know we want to make an offer on it.

The next day we walked through and I felt at peace. I felt at home. It was perfect.

All hardwood floors, beautiful gardens, two porches, and a lovely vintage feel.

PLUS it is literally one minute from where The Prayer Furnace (our prayer room community) meets every Friday. We were sold. We sat in the kitchen then and wrote up the offer.

It was lower than the asking price, but barely. 

Then last night (four days after it had been on the market) we found out our offer was accepted!

It all made sense then. The whole journey. God was delaying us to lead us to the perfect place. He is so so so good!

The back porch

(The following is for people we know... unless you really feel like its for you too) ;)

Now we do need some help with closing costs and fees, and if anyone feels like they want to support us here is a link to our GO FUND ME SITE:

CLICK

I can't wait to start inspiration looking for this house. We have literally no furniture, barely any house supplies, and no extra funds to buy anything, but it will be so fun to figure it all out. 

Marriage.

So I've been thinking a lot about marriage. Let me start off by saying being married to my Jasha is the best thing ever. No doubt.

All the same, I wanted to address some things here about about it.... specifically mine.

I feel as if I have if I may be a hinderance or a stumbling stone to some of my sisters in Christ &

here is why: I know a lot of girls struggle with seeing marriage as an idol. I know I did before I was married. I thought marriage would be the thing in life that would make everything perfect...that I would be complete & life would be beautiful. In a way these things are true, but in another  way they are not. 

On this blog I tend to post a lot about the great things in my life, but not so much about the trials. Well one thing I can tell you for sure is 
marriage is hard.

It does not complete you, or your life. 

& No matter how amazing your husband is (and mine is pretty darn amazing) he will make mistakes...

& hurt your heart. And you will make mistakes, and hurt his heart.

It's life.

It is NOT perfect. 

Within us all are deep and sometimes dark things that marriage will drag out and bring into the light and as a couple you must deal with them... no matter how much it hurts.

It's a blessing...That is for sure. You grow, and hopefully fall more in love.

And its worth it, at least in my opinion, but these trials can literally be the hardest seasons in life you have yet to deal with.

I know they were for me.

So I urge the single ladies out there to bear patience and wait for their husbands...because your single years are a true blessing. And I'm not just saying that.

(Me in my single years... Maybe 17 or 18 years old)

So  I apologize if it ever comes across as if I am  glamorizing my life or anything that may cause envy or jealousy. I felt the need to say that because our church community recently did public personal confession and I felt like I should address this after I heard a lot of girls talking about marriage idol-ness. We did this as a way of turning to the Lord, and committing ourselves to the intolerance of sins... even of little humanities that many times pass by. It was one of the most beautiful and powerful things I have ever witnessed... and afterwards we all took communion together... but anyways... my point is  I do not want to hinder a brother or sister in any way, and I pray that my posts are encouraging more than anything. 

I appreciate all my readers, and love to blog for my family & friends. & I can't wait until my Asher is born so we can introduce to you all on here :)

Love Letters

For no reason in particular.

Dear Lord, 

You are my everything.

Love, your girl

Dear Jasha,

You hold my heart.

Love, your Ellie

Dear Asher,

You are my dream.

Love, your Momma

source

Valentines day is soon & while I've never been that big of a celebrater of said day...

Jasha & I have a special day just 2 days after it.

It's our half year anniversary.

This Feb. 16th will a year and a half since we got married...

& I truly grow more in love with that man every day!

In other news I am sure you all know that Top Baby Blogs got reset...

Please spare two clicks to vote for my blog which you can do daily if you like.

It is a great way to meet other Momma bloggers and connect online.

Thanks so much.

31.

Since moving to Virginia I feel like the Lord wants me to really learn to have a gentle & loving spirit.

I have always been a bit more on the loud & fiesty side of things... but I long to really embody the woman of Proverbs 31.

I feel like these months before Asher is born is all about learning, listening and growing in what the Lord is telling me.

Therefore I was excited to see on my friend Mandy's blog at She Breathes Deeply

this Celebrate 31 post.

So here's the deal :

For 31 days, blog each day about things that celebrate your God given beauty, and the beauty of the women around you.

Want to join? Go over to Mandy's blog & link up!


It officially starts tomorrow but I jumped ahead a day so I can do my 23 week post tomorrow.

Day 1: 

What Does Beauty Mean to you?

Source

Beauty is so multidimensional to me.

Beauty is time. Aging. Grace.

Beauty is Jesus.

Beauty is seeing a new life begin. A full life end.

Beauty is watching my husband sleep, smile, and grow.

Beauty is feeling my baby kick.

Beauty is seeing my features in my family, and knowing they will continue on.

Beauty is dancing free in front of the Lord.

And then beauty is feeling broken, and breaking in this world to hopefully know God better.

Beauty is like water in that it is constantly changing form...

Changing how it makes you feel.

A raindrop and a storm are very different but then again they are still both forms of water.

That's how I see beauty.

Source

Here the list to follow: 

Day 1.  What does beauty mean to you?
Day 2.  What makes you uniquely you?
Day 3.  Who is someone you know who inspires beauty?
Day 4.  Style 31.  Post a pic of you in your favorite outfit.
Day 5.  Write a blog thanking someone who has made your heart come alive.
Day 6.  Jaded beauty.  Has the world's definition of beauty ever jaded you?
Day 7.  Write a blog to encourage another beautiful woman.
Day 8.  Have a beauty secret (e.g. hair tip, make up tip)?  Share, please!
Day 9.  What virtues do you value in yourself?
Day 10.  What is Jesus teaching you as a wife, mom, or friend? (Or just woman in general?)
Day 11.  Post a recipe.  Or if you don't cook, try a new recipe and write about how it turned out (pictures please!).
Day 12.  Write about what wears you out as a woman.
Day 13.  Write about something you would like to change about yourself for the better.
Day 14.  Style 31.  Post an outfit pic!
Day 15.  Write to encourage a friend.  Inspire her beauty.
Day 16.  Write a letter to your daughter, or a young girl in your life.  Tell her what beauty means.
Day 17.  Write about 3 things that make you happy.
Day 18.  Describe your personality.
Day 19.  Write about your favorite comfort food (we are women- we ALL have comfort food!)
Day 20.  Write about your job and why you love it or hate it.  
Day 21.  Write a letter to your husband to encourage him (or if you are single- your future husband.)
Day 22.  What are some needs that need to be met in your community?  Blog about how to extend your hand to those who need you.
Day 23.  What are your strengths?  What are your weaknesses?
Day 24.  What is Jesus teaching you presently?
Day 25.  Style 31.  Post a pic of your favorite comfy clothes.
Day 26.  What do you hope your grandchildren will say about you someday when you are gone?
Day 27.  Write a blog to encourage someone and build their confidence!
Day 28.  Write about your insecurities as a woman.
Day 29.  Write about "a day in the life of me."  (Pics are great!)
Day 30.  Who is your role model as a woman?
Day 31.  Write about your dreams and goals as a beautiful woman!

In other news stay tuned for more Asher related posts.
I cannot wait for my little boy!

Please vote for us here:

Inspiration Tuesday/Deep Thoughts

Let's Start With Some Deep Thoughts: 

(The day after we were engaged)

Jasha & I knew each other for four months when we got married.

We had been engaged for two.

While it was a magical romance... I can say one thing for sure...

We were young. 

Age wise I was young... barely 20 when we wed. Jasha was 23.

Still he had only been a Christian for about a week before we met.

But we knew we were made for each other.. that can always make things hard.

Because we got married so quickly we had to deal with things in early marriage that we hadn't laid down to the Lord. To be honest we didn't even know some of those things were buried deep with in us.

The key word of our marriage has been GRACE.

God is so good. He knew we would run together into marriage... He knew we were young.

He knew we needed to learn, and break to be His... for our marriage to be His.

Praise Him. 

Now we haven't even been married a year and a half yet, but I can honestly say we have grown up so much from the beginning. When we talk of our early days... we always say something like... wow we were young.And I love that. Its our path. It was at times hard. 

Still we even turned down wise counsel from  a few people who said to slow down, and that there was no need to rush. This was good counsel. We're sorry about not listening. Truly, wise counsel is a gift. That's something we have learned as well. Especially being in a city that is a bit of a wilderness to us, and without much counsel...it's a gift, and something to be cherished.

 But life can't be lived looking backwards. Thinking about what if? 

& My life is beautiful. It's full of grace. I think all life is a work in progress. 

Hopefully getting to know the Father more, and shedding our selfish ways.

Beauty in the breakdown right? 

With this all said I also want to say

My husband amazes me. I can't even in words say how amazing he is.
All I can say is

 He is something. 

Everyday I grow more in love with him. Everyday I am excited to see him grow more and more.

Anyways so my point.. sometimes people tell me they think our story is like a fairy tale and I'll agree I think it is (at least to me anyways ha)

BUT this is always another side.. a human side. 

And God is good and loves us humans no matter what.

No matter which way we go. He will always be there to faithfully guide you, to love you, and help you grow in Him, in love and in life.

Sooooo....

This is pretty deep. 

I'm pregnant. I'm pretty emotional sometimes. Especially tonight.

BECAUSE...

I think I felt my little one kick!

I really do... a few lil bitty thumps. 

After I cried this song came on in my itunes (see below) and it made me think about my life and how much Joshua & I have grown and I just praise God! For our life.... for growth... for His never ending grace. We are so blessed.

It's a pretty awesome song, and the only part that reminds me of us is the "we were young" part. 

Still it's awesome, please listen

So concludes my Inspiration Tuesday... I'll count it for my deep thoughts ha ;)

Shooter at my School

Last night I was sick, all night. I remember I even was frustrated with the Lord because I felt so terrible and I felt my prayers weren't doing anything.

Since I only slept 2 hours I decided at 6am  to skip my 8:00 am class at The University of Texas, where I am a senior (and will be graduating in December). I never skip this class.

I woke up a few hours later at 8:00 am (ish) to hear there was a active shooter at my school. More reports came in that he had shot himself, but no one was hurt, but campus was on lock down. They are currently looking for a second suspect. If I had been there, I would be in lockdown in a classroom right now, and probably much more frazzled than I am now here at home.

Praise God for me getting sick last night.
Praise God no one was injured.
He is good.

Here is my Inspiration Tuesday post that I actually wrote last night when I was sick for today:

I need some inspiration. I'm exhausted, busy, and sick... &thus a tad grumpy to be honest.

This week is just one of those long, everything is happening sort of weeks...

BUT this song, oh this song has gotten me through some

hard times

Its one of my favorites to listen to to remind me of what's important, 

and who's important.

I hope yall like it :)

My View On Clothes

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I really really enjoy styling when it comes to fashion. I told Jasha, the Hubs, I was going to incorporate more fashion into my blog
& I know him very well, so I already knew what face he would give me...
Let me tell you... The Hubs doesn't care two cents about fashion, so most of the time I dress him.
He of course voiced his concern to me that while he knows I have a good mindset when it comes to dressing I should probably express what I think on here.

(NOTE: These are all my personal viewpoints, and I don't intend to offend anyone with anything I say)

I think for the most part people dress to be noticed, and unfortunately I think our culture has taken this to a very dark place. A few years back, I was young and definitely pushed some barriers when it came to what I wore... whether my top was too low, or my stomach showed too much... I didn't care. & Oh yes, I argued it was not fair that girls couldn't wear two pieces at our youth retreats.

Now that I am older, married, and been in church classes with other newlyweds I feel I have a clearer understanding on lust, and how men battle it. Our culture, of course, does nothing to help them at all... It is all about sex, sex, sex (& not in the way that I believe it should be portrayed)
 Then boys show girls they will be noticed if they dress more in align with the culture, & so they do & its a vicious cycle. I think this is an issue because I firmly believe lust can be a killer to true love, which I believe is pure in it's real essence.

Now when I get dressed in the morning I think "Would I want Josh to be around a girl all day who is wearing this outfit?" & I really try to dress modestly, and mature while still being fashion forward.

Lately I've been meditating on 1 Peter 3:3-4 which states: 

Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.

In the end, I just don't want my clothes or fashion to ever be an idol.
(An idol is anything that takes your love & devotion from the Lord)
My love is the Lord, and I want to dress in way that I feel God would think is appropriate, in a way which honors my husband, AND in a way which still expresses my individual style...
Which I feel is all very doable.

With that all said here is another outfit I put together for the fall:
(I usually wear little slips under my dresses, my most recent purchase for one was here)

Autumn Winds by mrselisamarie featuring vintage handbags

I hope you all like it!